Job Done?

I sat in a coffee shop with a youth worker recently. She was pouring out her heart for the 18 year-olds who had just left her youth group, saying: ‘I really want to visit them at uni and make sure they’ve found a new church – I’d take them myself if necessary. The problem is they’re out of my remit, so I can’t get work time for it and I just can’t find the time outside of that’. This jarred with me, even if it made sense.

I understood that she was up to her eyeballs just serving those still at the church, but something inside me questioned the arrangement; where should the boundary of youth work lie in this instance - was the need to ‘finish well’ being missed? The relationship between ‘home churches’ and those who have moved on to university or into the workplace (even locally), is one of tension. Yet with the Church losing so many of its young people over the course of this transition it’s a relationship that needs addressing. We must consider some of these tensions and ask how we can finish well with our young people, launching them into a lifetime of discipleship and mission.

Tension one : still ours?

It seems natural to remain connected to young people heading off on a gap year. It’s short term, their church may have backed them financially and everyone’s excited for the stories they’ll bring back. But is university so different? Their first term lasts no more than 12 weeks, not unlike many short term mission trips, and they’ll only be gone for, at most, 36 weeks in a year. From anecdotal evidence Fusion reckons that the universities of the UK are largely 99 per cent unreached; we are sending our guys in there to live side by side with those who don’t yet know Jesus. Surely we should be waiting on tenterhooks to hear all the stories our students will bring back?

What if we saw students as missionaries of the home church? They’re walking into adulthood - off to build a life independently - and it is important that we prepare and release them into the fullness of that new start. We introduce them to ‘the way’, walk with them a while, and send them off to live lives of faith across the UK and beyond. They will require support, encouragement and help. They will face challenges, opportunities and changes. Their stories of faith, mission and discipleship hold deep encouragement to our home communities if we seek out their stories and rejoice in them together. The same goes for those who are moving into work. They may not be moving away from home but this is a deeply significant move into adulthood - they may stay connected to their home churches but this should only deepen our resolve to send them well and be intentional about connecting with their stories.

Paul knew how important this was: ‘I thank my God every time I remember you. In all my prayers for all of you, I always pray with joy because of your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now, being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus’ (Philippians 1:3-6). He rejoiced in seeing the fruit of the seeds he planted. He wasn’t in weekly contact or visiting his early church plants all the time - they cracked on with building a new life - but he did share in their story, celebrate their victories and engage with their ongoing journeys. This isn’t another task or responsibility but more to do with our perspective on those who are moving on from our youth groups. This moment should be a great opportunity to see a development or shift in the churches relationship with them, rather than signifying an end point. 

Tension two: time to call it a day?

Jesus’ prayer in the garden of Gethsemane echoes so clearly the heart of a youth worker: ‘I pray for them...Now I am no longer in the world, and I come to you. Holy Father, keep through your name those whom you have given me that they may be one as we are. While I was with them in the world, I kept them in your name...But now I come to you...I do not pray that you should take them out of the world, but that you should protect them from the evil one’ (John 17:13-17). Jesus is at a point of letting go, he has taught them about God, helped them to stay rooted in God and now he is to be separated from them. Note that his prayer is not just for what has been but for what will be. He is not just saying, ‘I’ve done my bit’, but instead, ‘They’ve got this far, this is what they need for the ongoing journey’. In fact, he makes very clear elsewhere that he is not just leaving, he’s passing the baton on - ‘And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another helper, that he may abide with you forever’ (John 14:16).

What are our prayers for those leaving our youth groups ? I believe that if we start praying for what comes next for our young people it will impact how we finish with them. What impressed me most about the youth worker I mentioned earlier was her desire to see her young people established, safe and connected on the other side of that move. She had a vision beyond her ‘remit’, drawing the boundary of youth work not as an end point but as a new start point. Surely we are failing our young people if we do not do everything we can to pass on the baton to the next chapter. This may not mean visiting every individual young person but it could mean scouting out potential churches with them online, calling them two weeks in to see how they’re getting on or committing to pray for that connection at the other end to happen.

This holds true for those heading into work as well. Despite them potentially staying in your church, they are leaving a defined place of belonging: the youth. Is it your assumption that they will naturally slip into the next ‘section’ of church life? Is there a ‘next step’ for them to connect with? Seeing them established with support for the next season might look like taking them to a new cell group, introducing them to mentors or individuals in the wider Church who can help them belong as an independent adult in your church community. The heart of a youth worker is not to make teenage disciples but lifelong ones, so surely youth work should go beyond getting them to the finishing line of adolescence, and instead aim to see them established at the start of what comes next? 

Tension three : they still identify themselves as ours

It may surprise you to hear that many young people identify with their home churches throughout their university lives, often, for longer than the home church identifies with them. They still see themselves as ‘going’ to that church, despite living away for threefifths of the year.

This poses both a challenge and an opportunity. The challenge lies with those students who use having a ‘home church’ as an excuse not to connect to one at university. This isn’t common, but it is happening. The concern is that it can lead to students building a new life on a rhythm that does not include church. This makes it easier to fall out of church altogether - with the home church assuming that they are plugged in at university and the churches in their university town having no idea of their existence.

The great opportunity, however, lies with those who rediscover their faith later on in their university experience. A few years ago we had a second year student slip into the back of our church, after opting out of church for his first three terms. While attending New Wine with his home church he realised what he’d left behind and heard God’s call on him to recommit his life. So often those who connect in their second or third years do so on the provocation of their home church. Are we there, still welcoming them back each holiday, giving them opportunities to rediscover, recommit, renew what might have grown cold in the many distractions of university life?

‘Do not give up meeting together as others are in the habit of doing’ insists Paul (Hebrews 10:25). Are we encouraging our young people to own this as they leave home? Are we releasing them to make deep connections elsewhere, to make church a pivotal part of their new life at university? Do we make the most of the long university holidays to persevere in the challenge and cheering on of our students? The university holidays also create a natural opportunity to reunite the old youth group, drawing back those who have moved into work and may have wandered off as their life changed pattern.

What should we do?

Youth workers and churches all over the country are living out this tension: finishing well, sending them out and remaining open to God’s further work through them. Taking these principles as a base, what might this look like for you in your context?

Jonny Pettman (a youth worker) and Jack Mariner (a student worker) from Frontline Church in Liverpool team up to spend a day preparing their young people for university life. This introduces the soon-to-be-students to Jack who keeps in touch with them when they return in the holidays. Who are the people in your church who might stay in touch with students throughout their university time? Who could you introduce your new working adults to?

Two years ago Nick Welford, a youth worker in Scarborough, had a young person, Claire, who was applying for university in York. As the locations were so close the two visited a church there one Sunday before she left home. Claire met the student workers, exchanged details with them and Nick was confident that when she arrived she would be welcomed and have a church family to be a part of. How might you connect your students to churches as they leave home?

Ramone Charles is a youth worker in London. He and his team committed, between them, to keeping in touch with each school leaver one-to-one and organising a couple of get-togethers each year to keep everyone connected. They gathered first in the summer to run Fusion’s preparation for university ‘Trainer Pack’ and then again the following Christmas. ‘We just went round the room and asked people to be open and honest about their first term at Uni. People started to share their experiences, whether they had a horrible first term or an amazing one. We did not just invite first years; we invited all university students that we knew in the church. They received a lot of questions from friends but it has opened up some amazing conversations and already two girls have come to know Christ through our guys.’ With one afternoon spent hanging out, Ramone encouraged those who were struggling, made space for those with stories to tell and discovered great encouragements for the church through their testimonies.

As our young people leave our youth groups we enter a time of tension and transition, connection and releasing. How we prepare, send, connect, welcome back and encourage them as they enter this new life stage will vary from church to church, but has a massive impact. I am convinced that those we send are our missionaries across the world. I am convinced that we should do all we can to see them well established in their next life stage, and am convinced that we have an opportunity to both bless and be blessed by those leaving our youth groups.  

Need more ideas for engaging with young people who have left your youth group? Check out university fresher Katie Smith’s top tips on the Youthwork website.